Nostalgia on the Gulf.

Today was interesting. I did my usual thing. You know, danced, read a little, played some acoustic. Then I suddenly got a text from an "old friend" who had moved to Vegas and then came back not too long ago. That someone wanted to get the hair coloured and catch up on old things.

My ex boyfriend, Jason came to hang out today. I dyed his hair black and while the colour was developing, we played our acoustics and sang. I haven't seen this kid in about two years. He hasn't changed much at all to be honest. He's still his whitty and corny self.

After the colour was rinsed and his hair had the blow job (it was blowdried, silly goose) and all that fun stuff, we went to Englewood Beach. It was nice. The weather was just as I like it, windy and chilly. The clouds formed a dome with a space up above so you can still see the stars, and the ocean was a bit angry. Each wave crashed in louder and harder (that's what she said).

He layed down and I layed my head on his stomach. We observed a big party going on not too much further down the beach. They were playing their acoustics around a big fire they had built. I was jealous of course because I knew they were going to end up getting their crunk on and I wanted to join. Very rarely are there parties like that. Highly illegal.

To be honest, laying there, I didn't have any thoughts of him in "that way" at all. I just kept looking out at the horizon wishing there would be a schooner infront of me so I can hop on and sail my way south.

We were talking about feeling isolated. We both were in agreement that being stuck here is like being locked in a prison. There are no opportunities here, nothing to do, no nightlife. Nothing. This place just lays lifeless.

He wants to tour, and I want to sail and do everything as I've planned. What sucks about having several months to a year to think and plan things out, is you tend overthink things. I just hope my life will go as planned. As for it being spontaneous, I just hope it's a positive spontaneous and not a horrific downfall.

Whatever. Anywho, I'm really happy I got to see his spiffy ass and I'm glad we see each other on a friendship level and not "the other way", because I honestly only want one person. I don't plan on having an interest in anyone else. There isn't anyone out there for me who I need other than who I've found, and it's worth the wait. Not only that, but Jason's been with the same girl for two years. I don't want to ruin that.

♥♪♫♥

This Year's Soundtrack.

I've come up with a playlist in which fits the year, and they all seem to fit the way things are going perfectly. Each one has lyrics in which truly describe my life's events and my emotions/opinions on things. No particular order really. Oh, and no sailor puns today.

1) Manchester Orchestra - I've Got Friends

2) Something Corporate - Konstantine (This makes me tear up lately. Reminds me of someone...)

3) Stefani Germanotta - I Wish You Were Here

4) Jack's Mannequin - Bruised

5) Regina Spektor - Genius Next Door | Laughing With

6) The Early November - Ever so Sweet (Of course I had to put this...)

7) Head Automatica - Nowhere Fast

8) Mayday Parade - The Last Something That Meant Anything (Same reason as Konstantine...)

9) Imogen Heap - Headlock

10) Anthony Green - Drug Dealer

11) Say Anything - A Walk Through Hell

12) Daphne Loves Derby - Sun (Acoustic)

13) Brand New - Soco Amaretto Lime

14) Ben Folds Five - All You Can Eat (This one really gets the word out and sums up all my greed/fatty rants! LOL)

15) Coldplay - The Scientist | In My Place

16) Tiësto - In The Dark

17) Cute is What We Aim For - I Don't Care if it's The Moon

18) The Postal Service - Such Great Heights

19) Emily Wells - Whiskey + Rags

20) Taking Back Sunday - MakeDamnSure

21) Senses Fail - Four Years | Fireworks at Dawn

22) Saves The Day - At Your Funeral

I'm sure there's plenty more, but I just put the basics. I need to go to bed, and dream about my next poem I want to post. Goodnight. ;]

♥♪♫♥

To Get Jobo Back in This World.

I hate having to speak of such sad topics, however, Jordan Radish was my best friend, as well as someone I looked up to. I feel the need to write about him in respect.

I keep having dreams about him being here. Then I wake up ridiculously sad, and it leaves me emotional the majority of the morning (or dare I say mourning because that's what all of us have been doing for the past month and a half). I dreamt of him being back here for one last week before his passing. I dreamt of all of us making the best of it. He didn't know he was going in the dream, but we all did. I remember being my usual spastic self slipping about it in conversation, which left him baffled about what had come out of my mouth. Luckily, I remember it was blown off ten seconds later. All of his friends were there. We were all giving him the best week ever. I can't quite remember the whole dream verbatim, of course, but it was nice.

I hated the part of awakening from it all. I hated getting back into reality knowing he's not here to his give his enthusiastic little chemistry lectures and to speak some Japanese with me. I miss listening to classical, and the acoustic bands we used to listen to together. My iPod made me so sad for a while because half the stuff on it reminded me of him. Yet I felt the need to listen to it all intentionally.

I wish life could be like Alice in Wonderland. Just as she can take that bite to make her grow, I would love to eat a magical piece of Ethiopian cuisine (one of his favourites) and he would magically come back. I wish it could be just as the flute is played and that snake dances out of the basket, a magical oboe can be played to make him magically waltz into the room. I would do anything to get my best friend back.

Well, I'm going to make this shorter and more simple than some posts. For we can all write a series of such awesome things about Jobo. He was just that great of a person, and would've been someone spectacular. Rest in Peace buddy.

♥♪♫♥

The Epic Journey Across The Sea.

Sooo. I had a really awesome convo... ehh... I guess you can say super early this morning? We'll, it was sometime between when Mr. Moon was sprinkling really pretty glittery things on the water and Mr. Obnoxious Orange Skittle was popping up over the horizon to kill it with his lazer vision. Let's just count it as last night. Anyway, on to the point on the treasure map (hehe yet another sailor metaphor! Yeeah! Scoaarrr!). So there's this list right? This list I've had in my mind and had even written parts of down before. It's a special list of how I want the other to be. I'm not typing my long ass essay of shallow as a shore expectations, but I will say it's a LONG list. Def having nothing to do with the last name "Long" of course. That "Mr. Long" just had the last name, but wasn't "Mr. Long List Live-up-to-er".

(...now I'm rambling...oh barnacles. LOL.)

About this novel of who I want someone to be. They had to be completely perfect. I mean, I thought I wouldn't find them because I was sooo shallow. So I was just going to have no choice but to unfortunately settle for something a bit lower (ew).

Shore enough, one day I was on this group page called "Everyone STFU! My Parents Are Calling!" or some tonfoolery like that. I was scrolling through the comments to see if anyone had an answer as clever as mine, and I came across this one kid. I was like aww I ♥ his beanie and his glasses. Just adorable, and seems like he would be pretty nice. So I was like, eh, add.

I didn't expect him to actually talk to me. So I replied to his wall post, "Hello new friend!" or some shit like that. We had a small convo there. That's where I found out he's in Brazil. (Mind you I've always had a HUGE thing for that type, so that was a plus. ;D) He IMed me after a while and we started talking about what we had in common. Pretty much clicked right away. Typing the same exact things back and forth, etc, etc, etc.

Everything he was mentioning about himself was on my list of things pretty much. I was like, is this kid for real? He's reading my mind. WTF. Such a trip. I got so excited. Crazy things that I don't generally tell people about myself, he was mentioning about himself. I was like wooahhh no way! Me so happy. ;D

So we went on cam after not even a week or so of daily convos. OMG his smile is amazing. I can't even put it into words. See that's what draws me to people. They have to have a perfect smile. Hell, Victoria's hawt and all, but I don't want a Posh Spice who never smiles. So if they do, it has to be perfect.

I also find it hawt that he wants to be multi-lingual just as I do. It's reeeeally cute when he speaks Portugese.

Well umm...

...Let's just say I can rave about him all day.

I want to go on a super epic pirate adventure to find him, and take him back to my port! (Arr? lol) I know we'll meet someday, and I hope he'll eventually be my Captain to venture the world with foreverrr.

P.S. It's not Andrew McMahon (as mentioned in the previous post)... This one is even better! XD

♥♪♫♥

...And You Tell Me That It's Over!

You wake up lying in a patch
of four leaf clovers!


Andrew McMahon is my dream man! ♥
Mhmm gurl I done went dere!

♥♪♫♥

Dear Haiti.

So much for the strike. I have failed you.
Looks like it takes more than will power.
I wish I had more to mail you.

Sitting here in luxury; Feeling guilty.
That little boy went 8 days.
He came out of that debree so filthy.

So shocking how he survived.
Luckily people saved him; Attatched that feeding tube;
But unfortunately, both his parents had died.

So devastating and tragic how he's not the only one.
Others suffered much worse; Laying in a near death waiting room.
With that huge lack of medical equipment to run.

I'm sending across the sea,
My best regards in a bottle.
Signed Sailboat Sincerely.

♥♪♫♥

On the Verge of Shore Happiness.

I'm pretty sure the genesis of my life's adventures won't happen until I flee from this shitty state of Florida. It's hell, and there's nothing genuine about it. There is nothing here for me. I need to port my Sailboat arse in Jersey.

My whole life is there:
♪ Cosmo School;
♪ Acting School;
♫ Two Different Top of the Line Dance Academies (Broadway, + King Centre);
♫♪ Music Schools Out The Arse (For Any Genre);
...the list goes on.

(...not to mention all those badass liberal hippies to party with! Yess!)


Soo many possibilities for me. I know I'll make it. Funny how I take discouragement as reverse psychology and it makes me twice as determined. It's as if the ones who don't give me encouragement want me to succeed and prove them wrong. Well guess what, I will.
There is so much I want to do with my life that I'm confused. One minute I want to own an upscale salon with a mini-cafe; Next minute I want to be a diplomat; However, to be honest, I really want to live in each country for a few months at a time. I want to see the whole world in every angle, view, perspective possible before I die. Life is way to short to waste sitting here accomplishing absolutely nothing. I feel like I'm trapped in a cage. I've been so irritable. Can someone please get me the key to this padlock and set me free from this prison cell of a state? That would be super duper awesome. I will love you forever.
Doumo! Grassy ass! Salamat! Shei shi! Thankies!

♥♪♫♥

Quoth Aristotle: "A Friend Is A Second Self.".

To float along the sea
or to be afloat in mid-air
Adventures are much more fun
if you are there!


With a smile to die for
With your persona so unique
Someone with a way with words
Someone I have to meet!


Hooray for the perfect captain
...but he's way across the sea
Hooray for the adventure to find you, Cap'n!
It'll be as epic as in the movies!


A sign for shore
I will remember
That night of conversation
Both at once mentioned The Early November!


Like an appletini
You're Ever So Sweet.
Why must you be in another hemisphere,
When you should be here sharing my seat?


I'm quite determined
There's nothing I wouldn't love most
Than to venture the world
With my best friend Marcos!

♥♪♫♥

The Strike.

It's day one.

Walked six miles for occupation.

My stomach cramped a bit.

The dog gave me motivation.

My jacket is black velour.

My top is red.

Was going to wear green velour.

I decided to wear this isntead.

Yeah this is what I'm doing.

Really no one's business.

I can do what I want.

Just pretend you didn't notice.

It's for the perfect cause.

In the end, that is all that will matter.

Many reasons for this activity.

In the end, you'll have an urge to flatter.

♥♪♫♥

That Bowl of Deluted Rice: A Killing Fields Book Review.

I have not read too much of this yet, however I can say that what I've read so far has been mind blowing. I know this book will be tear jerking. It's so pathetic how civilians of Cambodia were treated.

In 1975-1979, Cambodia was becoming over ruled by Khmer Rouge. They had executed over 200,000 people. That's a small number compared to the amount deaths caused by disease and starvation which is over 1.5 million out of the entire population of approximately 7 million people.

The Khmer Rouge regime would abduct children and transport them to orphanages and kill their parents/guardians. Once the children were adopted by their new families, they were forced to believe that their adopted families were their biological, and it was against the law to miss their old families. If any of the children gave any signs of that feeling, he/she would be executed.

The ones who weren't adopted were sent to these working grounds where they were forced to work 14+ hour days, and all they had to eat was a bowl of watered down rice after their hard work.

As for now, that's about the only description I can give until I read more. I will be posting much more about this. After reading that little bit of this book, I can honestly say that I just can't believe the amount of ignorance and greed I've witnessed in people. It truly sickens me. It makes me want to eat nothing but a bowl of deluted rice everyday for a couple weeks to see how it feels. Honestly, I know I can do that, because I appreciate having something to consume to keep me alive, no matter what it is. As long as I can survive.

I would love to take every fat pig I see stuffing their faces in buffets and put them through the anguish that the unadopted went through. Would they take a second look? Perhaps they would stop and think before sitting on their lazy asses devouring that unneeded "all you can eat pancake special" at IHOP or half pounder at Ruby Tuesday's? Disgusting, selfish bastards.

Well, I don't want to end up turning this book review into a giant fatty rant. So I'll stop here. Stay tuned for more about this...

♥♪♫♥

Ahoy.

Sailutations! I've decided to raise the mast of a more meaningful blog, for my other one was shorely not the most meaningful. I love to write poetry, book reviews, and most of all, I love to ramble about adventures in which I fantasize about traveling schooner or later in my lifetime. No one in person wants to listen, but they always seem to enjoy reading about them... Which is quite interesting to me. Oh well. I guess we shall now depart. =]

♥♪♫♥